DJRI's Rating System

DJRI evaluates Joints on a "One to Ten" scale with ten being the ultimate joint and one, of course, being no real joint at all. Confusion may arise here because of the mind set of poor souls who are incapable of "Thinking Outside the Box" and insist on employing the 5 star or other of the above mentioned systems that award gold stars to the classiest and most expensive establishments and few stars to what might be considered not so elegant. DJRI’s system is the inverse whereby a 5 Star establishment rates a lowly 1 or 2 and a Real Joint rates a ten! The Ship Tavern at the Brown Palace Hotel, for example, is a mere 1 (one) on the joint scale and a place like Billybobs Riverside Saloon (May it rest in Peace) or the Buck Snort Saloon near Pine, Colorado are awarded a 9 or 10. Hence the use of the pertinent expression," Thinking Outside the Box". By utilizing this unique technique, DJRI, being strongly client focused with a strategic game plan, continues to move forward and will go to the wall in its quest for the ultimate Joint and a win-win bottom line for its clients.

Of course part of DJRI’s evaluations are subjective, relying on the extensive and lengthy experience of dedicated Jointeros. In addition, DJRI has developed a point system of "too Many to Mention" characteristics which, when combined with the subjective evaluation, results in a simple and true measure of a Joint: It also becomes a useful and valuable tool for those seeking the comforts of a Real Joint and true enhancement of their quality time.

DJRI Point system aka. "Thinking Outside the Box"

Positive points are assigned to a Joint for various characteristics negative points for lack of good ones or preponderance of undesirable ones. A few of these benchmarks are listed below along with their point value, pos or neg. this is not a complete list but a mere sample since each Joint is unique and reflects the taste of its owner the bottom line being to give the audience a ballpark idea of what makes for a good Joint and what detracts from one.

Location:

Negative point are given to Places in high rent districts such as LoDo or DTC Positive points are awarded to places located in neighborhoods, low to medium rent areas, and shopping centers.

Ambiance:

Negative points are given to places with cover charges, Matre Di's, Linen or red checkered table cloths, fresh flowers, wine served by the bottle, high prices, stuffy atmosphere, valet parking, lovely views, pate foigras, Plastic, faux (i.e.. chains like Bennigans) etal. Positive points are awarded to places with lots of signs, TV's, electronic games, clean but interesting rest rooms, lots of tables and booths, music, friendly but not stuffy wait persons, and in general a comfortable atmosphere and feeling of being appreciated.

Management Attitude:

Positive points are awarded for and independent attitude, friendly country like attitude, willingness to please, feeling of friendship to customers, and the creation of a comfortable environment to all who enter. Negative point are given for conceited, inattentive servers (aka wait-staff, formerly known as waiters and waitresses) fawning, non-committal, tip automatically added to bill.

Entertainment:

Electronic games, juke box, biker babes playing pool.Negative point given for too many and noisy TV's, loud live bands, yuppie sports bars.

Uniqueness

Positive points are awarded for realness, worn and old oaken back bars, photographs of the old parts of Denver, Log cabin atmosphere ( like the Buck Snort Saloon) Tasteful graffiti.

Advertising:

Positive points are awarded for outside beer signs if tasteful. Negative points given for commercial ads on the walls.

Inside Appointments:

Positive points awarded for comfortable furniture, bar stools and bar rails, vinyl covered booths, flowers in beer bottles, Charles Russell prints on the wall, sports figures paintings on walls, interesting wall adornment in rest rooms, menus on wall. Negative points given for flowers in vases, lamps on tables, masters painting on walls (Van Gogh), menus in foreign language.

Special Items:

Positive point for sports pools under $5.00

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